Worst Movie or Show

[Brandon]

What's the worst movie, show, play, event, recital, concert you've ever had to witness?

You could have done it because you thought it would be good, for work, for a spouse, for a kid, etc.

But what have you had to sit through that was so bad that you literally thought, "I am never getting this time back..." and it was just the biggest waste of time to you and hated every minute or second of it?

[Blarg]

Natural Born Killers was the only movie I ever walked out of. Everyone seems to be enamored by Quentin Tarrantino films. Most of them are crap, this is the bottom of the crap heap. 

[Taylor]

When I was like 13 I went to my friend's birthday party and we saw The Adventures of Pluto Nash with Eddie Murphy. Even at 13 I recognized what a terrible movie it was.

[cals]

Hey Taylor what was that faggy piece of crap you wrote?  I’d like to vote for that.

[Jason]

Good question as there is a lot of bad movies. The Human Centipede was pretty bad as it just left me with a terrible feeling in my soul after watching it. TV wise, my wife watches all that Real Housewives nonsense. That shit is beyond awful and even if they showed their bare, fake titties on a routine basis that couldn't save it 

[T.G.]

A 1985 movie called "After Hours." I don't remember much about it, but the title stuck in my head all these years later. I hated it and walked out because it was painfully boring. It's the only movie I ever walked out of.

[WicketMaiden]

Probably one of the rom-coms I've had to endure down the years for bonus boyfriend points. No idea what they're called, I tend to zone out and think about something more interesting while inanely smiling in the vague direction of the screen. I have to endure a couple of scenes here and there just to give a convincing performance in the conversations later, but mostly I'm not in the room mentally.

[ten ocho recon scout]

Some idiot guy I used to work with recommended that Cop Out movie with Bruce willis. So I took my ex on date night to see it.

Literally one of those where the first minute or two of the movie you knew it was going to be horrible.

[cysomeawfulpitcher]

45 minutes ago, T.G. said:

A 1985 movie called "After Hours." I don't remember much about it, but the title stuck in my head all these years later. I hated it and walked out because it was painfully boring. It's the only movie I ever walked out of.

That is underrated Scorsese.  Give it another chance.  I’ve seen much worse from him.  Looking at you, Color of Money.

[cysomeawfulpitcher]

Worst movie I paid to see in a theater.  I use to like Anne in Prada and Rachel Getting Married.  I didn’t expect greatness but this was just pathetic.

[cals]

1 hour ago, Jason said:

Good question as there is a lot of bad movies. The Human Centipede was pretty bad as it just left me with a terrible feeling in my soul after watching it. TV wise, my wife watches all that Real Housewives nonsense. That shit is beyond awful and even if they showed their bare, fake titties on a routine basis that couldn't save it 

You can eat shit for badmouthing the Human Centipede. I have a little figurine of Dr. Heiter in my office.  Love that move. 

[Tank]

when my wife and i were first married we tried to see a lot of the best picture nominees for the oscars. we rented The Accidental Tourist (late 80s) about a travel writer and his adventures. It had a ton of oscar buzz and was nominated in several categories. it was, hands down, the most boring movie we had ever seen. dry doesn't begin to cover it. uninteresting characters in uninteresting places doing uninteresting things. it sucked beyond normal sucking.

[Lhalo]

 

[Jason]

25 minutes ago, cals said:

You can eat shit for badmouthing the Human Centipede. I have a little figurine of Dr. Heiter in my office.  Love that move. 

How’s your soul doing?

[cals]

3 minutes ago, Jason said:

How’s your soul doing?

Same as before. 

Dark.

[Brandon]

1 hour ago, WicketMaiden said:

Probably one of the rom-coms I've had to endure down the years for bonus boyfriend points. No idea what they're called, I tend to zone out and think about something more interesting while inanely smiling in the vague direction of the screen. I have to endure a couple of scenes here and there just to give a convincing performance in the conversations later, but mostly I'm not in the room mentally.

When I came up with the question, I put spouse for those dragged to a shitty concert or event, but didn't think about the bf/gf angle and it reminds me of a funny rough one....I'm shaking my head remembering this as I read yours.

In 2011 a lady and I decide to go on a second date. When we wanted to get together it coincided with a play or performance her friend was doing at the local college there in Claremont. She invited me and I went being flexible as she got to kill two birds with one stone. My expectations are super low as I figured it is just some college kids doing Hamlet or some shit, plus, I don't really know the girl/date too well.

We sit down and it ends up being a full blown ballet type of performance. I ask her which performer is her friend and it just so happens to be the only gay guy on stage. Great, I now am stuck for an hour/hour and a half watching twinkle toes prance around a stage. She didn't tell me it was a ballet and had that wry smile knowing it wasn't my jam, but that I was passing the date test for being a gentleman about it all. An hour or so in that situation has a myriad of thoughts race......Do I just bail since it's a second date? How much do I like this chick? We haven't even had sex yet, is this a sign of things to come? Would dating this girl make this a normal thing?

I make it through unscathed outside of that exact topic question of a thought......"What a waste of time"

The funny thing I do remember was afterwards we met the dude as she wanted me to meet him (aka he checks me out for approval). When we meet I say, "Great job with the performance" and all three of us kind of pause knowing I just said the most disingenuous thing possible as we all know I know nothing about ballet or have been to one before.

Wild addendum to the story, the dude ended up coming out as a sex addict and had the gnarliest hookup stories.....from some gay park in London when he did a study abroad program to the bath houses in Hollywood. I remember that's also how I found out what Grindr was. Dude ended up getting HIV or AIDS (or both, I don't remember) and was part of some medical study at UCLA for disease study.

[Taylor]

1 hour ago, Lhalo said:

 

Finally something we agree on. Big Bang Theory is awful.

[Jason]

3 hours ago, Taylor said:

Finally something we agree on. Big Bang Theory is awful.

I have never seen an episode 

[Jason]

5 hours ago, WicketMaiden said:

Probably one of the rom-coms I've had to endure down the years for bonus boyfriend points. No idea what they're called, I tend to zone out and think about something more interesting while inanely smiling in the vague direction of the screen. I have to endure a couple of scenes here and there just to give a convincing performance in the conversations later, but mostly I'm not in the room mentally.

Your peeps brought us Hugh Grant and most of his stuff deserves a post here

[Jason]

We need @tdawg87to give us a review of The Lemon Party. It sounds like it could have been awful 

[JAHV76]

The Abbys. It started off good but ended with crappy special effects. Almost like they ran out of money towards the end.

[arch stanton]

Most of you won’t remember the early ‘80s but it was a pretty brutal economic time. I was about to graduate from high school and was getting limited hours as a busboy so my money was tight. I was living in Colorado at the time and Aerosmith was coming to McNichols Arena to play. 
 

Toys In The Attic was one of the first albums I ever owned and I was a pretty big fan. I scratched together enough money to buy tickets for my girlfriend and me to be right down in front. 
 

So this was 1982 and they were a coked out mess and it was by far the worst live show I’ve ever seen. No wonder Joe Perry left. It was like a bad cover band doing an all Aerosmith set. To this day I still won’t pay a nickel for anything they put out 

 

[Adam]

Live event: Mike Birbiglia at the Improv

Movie: The Devil's Own 

Honorable Mention: A Ducks game

[Brandon]

6 hours ago, Adam said:

Live event: Mike Birbiglia at the Improv

Movie: The Devil's Own 

Honorable Mention: A Ducks game

Thought for sure the movie would be The Manchurian Candidate 

[Slegnaac]

Popeye staring Robin Williams