The Monkey's Paw

[arch stanton]

1 hour ago, Slegnaac said:

Your wish has been granted, all of your posts on Angelswin.com along with tour user account have been erased from the database, never to be seen again.

I wish the 2022 labor dispute had shortened the regular season to 44 games.

Your wish is granted. But the time you would have spent watching baseball must now be filled watching The Real Housewives Of Thule, Greenland

I wish the Stanley Cup Finals games didn't air at 3 Am local time for me

[Tank]

30 minutes ago, arch stanton said:

Your wish is granted. But the time you would have spent watching baseball must now be filled watching The Real Housewives Of Thule, Greenland

I wish the Stanley Cup Finals games didn't air at 3 Am local time for me

Your wish is granted. From now on the Cup Finals will be shown at prime time just for you but the Avs will never be in them again.

I wish the Kings and Angels would win championships in the same season multiple times.

[gotbeer]

5 hours ago, Tank said:

Your wish is granted. From now on the Cup Finals will be shown at prime time just for you but the Avs will never be in them again.

I wish the Kings and Angels would win championships in the same season multiple times.

Your wish is granted.  The Sacramento Kings and Angel City FC win championships in the same season multiple times.

I wish I didn't have to get up so dang early to go hiking, just so I can find decent parking.

[T.G.]

2 hours ago, gotbeer said:

Your wish is granted.  The Sacramento Kings and Angel City FC win championships in the same season multiple times.

I wish I didn't have to get up so dang early to go hiking, just so I can find decent parking.

Your wish has been granted.  Get up whenever you want, there is a reserved parking space reserved for you; however, all your hikes must take place with you wearing a gorilla suit.

I wish I could go fishing every day.

 

[Slegnaac]

7 hours ago, True Grich said:

Your wish has been granted.  Get up whenever you want, there is a reserved parking space reserved for you; however, all your hikes must take place with you wearing a gorilla suit.

I wish I could go fishing every day.

 

Your wish has been granted, every day of your life you type out emails informing people that you have discovered that they are long over due to receive US$21.5M that the United Nations has been withholding.  They only need to send you their bank information so you can forward them the proceeds.  No one responds to your emails.

I wish that people in the neighborhood would stop shooting off Fireworks in the middle of the night.

[Blarg]

That was fishing, not phishing.

[gotbeer]

3 hours ago, Slegnaac said:

Your wish has been granted, every day of your life you type out emails informing people that you have discovered that they are long over due to receive US$21.5M that the United Nations has been withholding.  They only need to send you their bank information so you can forward them the proceeds.  No one responds to your emails.

I wish that people in the neighborhood would stop shooting off Fireworks in the middle of the night.

Your wish is granted.  Now people in your neighborhood will stop shooting off Fireworks in the middle of the night.  Now they will shoot off guns in the middle of the night.

I wish politicians would fight for the people and not the lobbyists.  

[Slegnaac]

2 hours ago, Blarg said:

That was fishing, not phishing.

The Genie is Centuries old and gets confused at times.

[cysomeawfulpitcher]

58 minutes ago, gotbeer said:

Your wish is granted.  Now people in your neighborhood will stop shooting off Fireworks in the middle of the night.  Now they will shoot off guns in the middle of the night.

I wish politicians would fight for the people and not the lobbyists.  

They fight for the people...as long as they ride Osama Bin Trump's toad.

I wish Amber Heard was recast in her Aquaman 2 role.

 

[Blarg]

19 hours ago, Slegnaac said:

The Genie is Centuries old and gets confused at times.

The genie missed a chance to put him on a pontoon boat in the Salton Sea and had to eat everything he caught.

[Taylor]

20 hours ago, cysomeawfulpitcher said:

They fight for the people...as long as they ride Osama Bin Trump's toad.

I wish Amber Heard was recast in her Aquaman 2 role.

 

Your wish has been granted. Amber Heard's character will now be played by none other than everyone's favorite comedian and actress, Amy Schumer.

I wish my cats could use their litter boxes without spreading litter everywhere on the floor.

[T.G.]

4 hours ago, Taylor said:

Your wish has been granted. Amber Heard's character will now be played by none other than everyone's favorite comedian and actress, Amy Schumer.

I wish my cats could use their litter boxes without spreading litter everywhere on the floor.

Your wish has been granted, but now you can only feed them live mice. 

I wish I could spend the summer going to every major league ball park. 

[Taylor]

12 minutes ago, True Grich said:

Your wish has been granted, but now you can only feed them live mice. 

I wish I could spend the summer going to every major league ball park. 

Your wish is granted. You leave tomorrow for your trip around the country, visiting every Major League Soccer stadium.

I wish Red Robin would bring back their Mountain High Mud Pie.

[Blarg]

Taylor, you left out the part about him doing janitorial duties. 

[HanfordGuy]

3 minutes ago, Taylor said:

Your wish is granted. You leave tomorrow for your trip around the country, visiting every Major League Soccer stadium.

I wish Red Robin would bring back their Mountain High Mud Pie.

Your wish is granted, but it’s brought back as “Mile High Mud Pie” made with your help in the bathroom of a Spirit Airplane.

 

I wish I had more money than Elon Musk!

[T.G.]

9 minutes ago, HanfordGuy said:

Your wish is granted, but it’s brought back as “Mile High Mud Pie” made with your help in the bathroom of a Spirit Airplane.

 

I wish I had more money than Elon Musk!

Your wish is granted, but you can only spend a dollar a day and when you pass away, the remainder of your fortune has to be left to all the people who pissed you off during your lifetime.

I wish blarg would STFU.

[T.G.]

5 hours ago, Blarg said:

The genie missed a chance to put him on a pontoon boat in the Salton Sea and had to eat everything he caught.

 

18 minutes ago, Blarg said:

Taylor, you left out the part about him doing janitorial duties. 

F this guy.

[WicketMaiden]

18 hours ago, True Grich said:

 

F this guy.

Your wish is granted, you must make passionate love to Blarg non-stop for a week, (ok, you can stop to eat, but no showering!).

 

I wish I had some of Spiderman's skills.

[Blarg]

9 minutes ago, WicketMaiden said:

Your wish is granted, you must make passionate love to Blarg non-stop for a week, (ok, you can stop to eat, but no showering!).

 

I wish I had some of Spiderman's skills.

[T.G.]

14 minutes ago, WicketMaiden said:

Your wish is granted, you must make passionate love to Blarg non-stop for a week, (ok, you can stop to eat, but no showering!).

 

I wish I had some of Spiderman's skills.

Your wish has been granted.  Bad news is your life-partner is a black widow and you know what happens after she mates with you, right?

I wish all forms of social media disappeared.

[T.G.]

 BTW... @WicketMaiden is a wanker.

[WicketMaiden]

30 minutes ago, True Grich said:

Your wish has been granted.  Bad news is your life-partner is a black widow and you know what happens after she mates with you, right?

I wish all forms of social media disappeared.

Your wish is granted, a once in a millennium solar mass ejection wipes out every computer chip on earth. No social media. Also no computers, no money, no running water, heating, lighting, or law and order either unfortunately, and everyone you love will know it was your fault.

 

I wish I had the reaction speed of elite athletes.

[Taylor]

Your wish is granted. You have the reaction speed of elite athletes, but you can't turn it off. You now are constantly reacting to everything that moves, and your adrenaline rush never ends, so you're always on high alert like you're Jason Statham in a Jason Statham movie.

I wish all personal attacks on AngelsWin would stop permanently.

[T.G.]

7 minutes ago, Taylor said:

Your wish is granted. You have the reaction speed of elite athletes, but you can't turn it off. You now are constantly reacting to everything that moves, and your adrenaline rush never ends, so you're always on high alert like you're Jason Statham in a Jason Statham movie.

I wish all personal attacks on AngelsWin would stop permanently.

Your wish has been denied.  Lock the thread.

[Taylor]

30 minutes ago, True Grich said:

Your wish has been denied.  Lock the thread.

Boring.