Ohtani

[ten ocho recon scout]

Watching him struggle that inning against Oakland got me thinking.

Have we considered tipping his pitches to the other team to drive down his value? (Just until we sign him, of course).

Also. Have we tried pretending we're pregnant to get him to stay? 

[mrwicked]

DFA him.

[Taylor]

This game will shed about $5M off his future deal.

[Docwaukee]

15 minutes ago, Taylor said:

This game will shed about $5M off his future deal.

unless he hits for the cycle and the HR is a walk off.  

[Adam]

16 minutes ago, Docwaukee said:

unless he hits for the cycle and the HR is a walk off.  

might need it with this pen

[ten ocho recon scout]

45 minutes ago, Docwaukee said:

unless he hits for the cycle and the HR is a walk off.  

He just failed again.

This is where Moreno needs to walk downstairs, and say "hey Loser. Can't believe I'm doing this. But I don't want to see you end up homeless, giving handjobs for a grand slam breakfast.

 

Here's a 7 year deal. Sign it before I come to my senses."

And then Ohtani has to make a choice.... and he looks to see if Arte is sweating, like when the guy in Total Recall offered Arnold the pill.

[ten ocho recon scout]

[T.G.]

1 hour ago, ten ocho recon scout said:

Have we tried pretending we're pregnant to get him to stay? 

That is exactly the kind out-of-the-box thinking we need in the FO.

[T.G.]

TORS - perhaps you could kidnap Ippei...

[AngelsLakersFan]

2 minutes ago, ten ocho recon scout said:

He just failed again.

This is where Moreno needs to walk downstairs, and say "hey Loser. Can't believe I'm doing this. But I don't want to see you end up homeless, giving handjobs for a grand slam breakfast.

 

Here's a 7 year deal. Sign it before I come to my senses."

And then Ohtani has to make a choice.... and he looks to see if Arte is sweating, like when the guy in Total Recall offered Arnold the pill.

First things first, no more compliments, no more praise, let him know a winning player is a player under a long term, team friendly contract.

[AngelsLakersFan]

1 minute ago, T.G. said:

TORS - perhaps you could kidnap Ippei...

We are stringing together some great ideas here.

[ten ocho recon scout]

20 minutes ago, T.G. said:

TORS - perhaps you could kidnap Ippei...

I actually have.

If we give him say 2 million, that's peanuts for Moreno. 

 

We put 2 mill in his pocket, and instruct him to f*ck up translations.... might pay off huge dividends down the road.

 

"I just want to win, and save the world" - Shohei

"I want to have sex with kids and burn the flag." - Ippei

 

(Ippei lowers his head... knows he's going to hell.... but also knows his new Seadoos are getting delivered on Monday)

[Taylor]

4 minutes ago, ten ocho recon scout said:

I actually have.

If we give him say 2 million, that's peanuts for Moreno. 

 

We put 2 mill in his pocket, and instruct him to f*ck up translations.... might pay off huge dividends down the road.

 

"I just want to win, and save the world" - Shohei

"I want to have sex with kids and burn the flag." - Ippei

 

(Ippei lowers his head... knows he's going to hell.... but also knows his new Seadoos are getting delivered on Monday)

Arrest one of those Chilean burglar dudes, then offer him freedom if he kidnaps Ippei.

[ten ocho recon scout]

20 minutes ago, AngelsLakersFan said:

We are stringing together some great ideas here.

Way the hell better than anything Perry has so far, I guarantee.

 

Next step is a boot on his car tire, when we know he's meeting with other GMs.

Anyone remember the movie The Truman Show? 

 

Roadblocks. Like when Jim Carrey tried to leave the island.

 

Hack Ohtanis iPad, play bad news from EVERY other MLB city.

"There was a tornado in Los Angeles today" (that happened last month)

"Hobos gone wild!" - in NYC

"Johnny Depp was a pirate, and his wife shits the bed" - Pittsburg

 

And on and on and on

[totdprods]

@ten ocho recon scout

man…more of this stuff ok 

[ten ocho recon scout]

Just now, Taylor said:

Arrest one of those Chilean burglar dudes, then offer him freedom if he kidnaps Ippei.

Bro... if we ever arrest one.. it will be the first....

 

And even if we offered him money to kidnap Ippei, he'll laugh, and go hit a richer home in Cota de caza

[ten ocho recon scout]

Arte with fake pimples... pretending to want an autograph...

 

..... on the new contract....

 

Would totally stand up in court.

 

"That's his John Hancock, your honor. We had it graded by Beckett." - Carpino

[gotbeer]

14 minutes ago, ten ocho recon scout said:

Way the hell better than anything Perry has so far, I guarantee.

 

Next step is a boot on his car tire, when we know he's meeting with other GMs.

Anyone remember the movie The Truman Show? 

 

Roadblocks. Like when Jim Carrey tried to leave the island.

 

Hack Ohtanis iPad, play bad news from EVERY other MLB city.

"There was a tornado in Los Angeles today" (that happened last month)

"Hobos gone wild!" - in NYC

"Johnny Depp was a pirate, and his wife shits the bed" - Pittsburg

 

And on and on and on

 

Hear what the Padres did to children?

You were on the Ham Fighters, it's in your DNA that you hate the Giants.

Houston, Hurricanes, and Trash Cans.

Remember what Boston did to Daisuke, that is norm for them, they are assholes.

And if all else fails.  I have pictures of you and Cals.  You don't want those to go public.

[gurn67]

If you have to pay him $50 million a year to stay. Somebody it going to give him that. Cohen would do it in a second. It's going to cost that much to replace him. Signing a number one starter, AND a hitter of his ability is going to actually cost more than that per year on the free agent market. 

 

 

[Angel Oracle]

11 minutes ago, gotbeer said:

 

Hear what the Padres did to children?

You were on the Ham Fighters, it's in your DNA that you hate the Giants.

Houston, Hurricanes, and Trash Cans.

Remember what Boston did to Daisuke, that is norm for them, they are assholes.

And if all else fails.  I have pictures of you and Cals.  You don't want those to go public.

Remember how the Doyyers forced homeowners out of Chavez Ravine to build the stadium.

[Torridd]

1 hour ago, ten ocho recon scout said:

Such a great part of a great movie. I still think this is one of Sharon Stone's best movies.

[REDneck]

5 minutes ago, Torridd said:

Such a great part of a great movie. I still think this is one of Sharon Stone's best movies.

She didn't "uncross" her legs in this movie..not the best!

[ten ocho recon scout]

1 hour ago, Torridd said:

Such a great part of a great movie. I still think this is one of Sharon Stone's best movies.

I'm not a sci-fi guy, bit that movie is still fucking cool today. (And not just to daydream about chicksnwoth 3 boobs)

 

It's still 30 years later one of those movies you can kick your feet up and smile ... not many movies can do that.

 

[ten ocho recon scout]

1 hour ago, REDneck said:

She didn't "uncross" her legs in this movie..not the best!

She did. She literally Axe-kicked Arnold in the face.

 

 

... and we all paused that part as kids

[ten ocho recon scout]

PAUSE! PAUSE!...