PercySquint

Here you go... And one of Carlos, while we're at it...

Day 3- Another hot one under the blazing Arizona sun, A rather depressing loss to the stinking Seachickens today. Didn't see much good, except for Howie, who continues to obliterate Cactus League pitching, and Speedy Petey who went bomb sauce again (Huh?). We'd had enough after 6 innings, so we decide to wander over to the back fields and see if anything's going on back there. There was. 2 minor league games against Chokeland. And ya just never know who ya might run into. Maybe a World Series MVP, or an 11-time Gold Glove winner, who knows? My friend LongHairDontCare has a special talent: he is extremely gifted in the art of obtaining game balls, foul balls, autographs, batting gloves, pine tar rags, you name it. And today was no exception. He got balls signed by Hamilton, Jepsen, Kohn, Maronde, and Madsen. And that's just today. I asked him how many balls he's gotten in the last 3 days. He said "I don't know. 20 maybe?" If this were a marketable skill, he'd be richer than the Federal Reserve. My other friend HaloMVP is no slouch either. He got a signed Hamilton bat, and balls signed by Vernon and Frieri, not to mention the David Eckstein photo. Me? I'm not much into the autograph thing, so I got nothing. This panel would look very nice in my living room. Ran into some nice folks from AW.com. They are getting drunk with other folks from AW.com as we speak. Stretch 'em if ya got 'em... Bunch of rail birds. Is Hanson replacing Santana or Haren? Can never remember... Our new right fielder, whatshisname. King of the Cactus League bomb sauce. Meanwhile.... Don't get this kind of access at the Big A. But you do here at Tempe Diablo. Eckstein and I exchanged hat compliments and chit chat. I told Omar Visquel it's good that he's in camp to show the youngsters how it's done. He asked me if I was from Vietnam. LongHairDontCare models HaloMVP's freshly signed Hamilton bat. LongHairDontCare has excellent taste in tattoos. HaloMVP models his new balls.

Day 2- We arrive at Tempe Diablo bright and oily. I head straight to the back practice fields, Filiberto's breakfast burrito in hand, for morning workouts. In the very back, there are 4 fields in a cloverleaf formation, allowing me to see the action on all 4 fields at once. I spot Nathan Haynes and we chat for a bit. Why is this significant? Because of the thousands of Halos games I've attended in my life, the only foul ball I ever snagged came off the bat of Mr. Haynes. In his first big league at-bat. Off George Sherrill of the Seachickens. He ended up getting a base hit, a line drive up the middle. Mr. Haynes was very surprised I knew all this. "You're a hardcore" he said. "Nah" I replied. "I'm Aztec." After breakfast at the cloverleaf, I walk over to the 8-mound bullpen. 3 pitchers are throwing. Bill Lacheman is schooling youngsters festooned in the tools of ignorance. I stand by the catchers so I can listen to "that sound". I love that sound. That special THWAK!!! noise as the ball hits the catcher's mitt. I love the sound of THWAK!!! in the morning. It sounds like.....victory. It's almost game time, so I head over to the stadium. I run into Chuck and Brian. Fancy seeing them here. And this game was exactly what I needed, a delicious 12-4 beatdown of the stinking Whiteys. What, no tie score??? Not today. Trout is officially berserk- a bomb, a wallbanger double, stolen base, 2 RBI's, 3 runs scored, and now hitting .407 for the spring. Can you imagine how good he'd be if he wasn't such a fat slob? And Howie- only a double, a triple, 2 more RBI's and 2 runs scored. This does not suck. Also, I was rather impressed after my first look at Jason Vargas. In 4 and 2/3's, I only saw 3 balls hit solidly. This guy know how to locate, change speeds, and miss bats. Despite the Hat and ample sunscreen, I'm burnt and drained tonight. But it's well worth it. I bask in the afterglow of "just another Halo victory." And clearly, I am a blessed man, because I get to do this again tomorrow too. This means you. But not me, I go wherever the hell I want. Orlando Mercado said so. Army of farmhands. They practice, I eat. Not so bad. Let's go hit! That cart's got balls. Good wheels too. Let's go pitch. THWAK!!! I think this is Carlos Ramirez, but they all look alike when the mask goes on. Your humble narrator with your humble website creator. Trout goes bombsauce, then handshake line. Keepin' their heads in the game. Trout. The Troutster. Troutsy. Troutmeister. Troutalopagus. And thank you for YOUR contribution, Albert. All of you should be here. I hope Gotbeer isn't offended... Saw this on the side of a vehicle in the parking lot. Never eaten there, but they have a catchy mission statement, yes?

It has begun. My friend LongHairDontCare and I roll into town Tuesday evening. My other friend HaloMVP loves the Cactus League so much that he moved there. So he'll put us up for the week, right? Uh, no. He's housing Angels minor leaguers at his place all month, so no room at the inn. As he explained, Angels minor leaguers are more important than his friends, so there we are. Nonetheless, we are in for 5 days of exciting action-packed Halos baseball, up close and personal. It is good. Earlier today, I saw my beloved Halos play the stinking Pods in Peoria, my first Halos game in 6 months. The drought is OVER. Trout, with a triple, double, and a walk, looks like he's pickin' up where he left off last year. Not bad for a fat guy. Bourjos went bomb sauce. Wtf was that? Albert and Hamilton with a 2-out RBI's didn't suck either. Off to bed now. Tomorrow we rise early to catch morning drills, PFP, infield roulette, etc. out on the back fields of Tempe Diablo, the crown jewel of the Cactus League. It is a beautiful thing. I eagerly look forward to the rest of the week, culminating of course with AW FanFest Saturday. Please join Arte, Jerry, Victor, Tim, and myself as we come together to celebrate my beloved Halos. SquintFest is on, bitches. My favorite freeway sign on the way out. This is passing by Ironwood State Prison, where LongHairDontCare spent a little time at one point. This time he got to drive past it and wave to the fellas. That's much better. Your humble narrator. Trumbo and Howie ignoring the Peoria zoo. A broadcaster with LongHairDontCare. Old HOF'ers need cash too. Rollie Fingers, Mudcat Grant, and Gaylord Perry sellin' their balls. I shook hands with Mr. Perry, then grabbed a napkin to wipe off the foreign substance he left on my hand. View of Trumbo from our crappy seats.

...who yer gonna run into sometimes. Lol...

Technically, yes. But I don't like it.

Concur. I don't care who's or who's not in the lineup, this is a MUST-WIN game. Now let's go frickin' HIT !!!

I don't like it either, but only because I can't be in two places at the same time.