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  1. The last thing we want to see is Upton and Trout sharing a ventilator.
  2. If the CoronaVirus is still active in May it’s going to be very difficult to have every MLB player agree to show up. With the shortage of hospital beds and ventilators nationwide it’s going to be a tough thing to justify putting people in harms way for entertainment purposes only.
  3. “high-ranking federal public health officials who believe the league can safely operate amid the coronavirus pandemic”. Name one official that would take responsibility for putting players lives at risk for the sole purpose of entertainment.
  4. Tommy Lee lol An open letter to the president Dear Fucking Lunatic, At your recent press conference - more a word salad that had a stroke and fell down stairs, you were CLEARLY so out of your depth you needed scuba gear. Within minutes of going off air your minions were backpedaling faster than Cirque De Soliel acrobats... In India a week ago, i couldn’t get past the bit about your being the most popular visitor in the history of fucking india — a country of a BILLION human souls that’s only 3000 years old, give or take.!!! Trust me - Gandhi pulled CROWDS.. You pulled a cricket stadium and half WALKED out... Do you know how fucking insane you sound, you off-brand butt plug? That's like the geopolitical equivalent of “that stripper really likes me” — only 10,000 times crazier and less self aware. You are fucking exhausting. Every day is a natural experiment in determining how long 300 million people can resist coring out their own assholes with an ice auger. Every time I hear a snippet of your Queens-tinged banshee larynx farts, I want to scream! We are fucking tired. As bad as we all thought your presidency would be when Putin got you elected, it’s been inestimably worse. You called a hostile, nuclear-armed head of state “short and fat.” How the fuck does that help? You accused a woman — a former friend, no less — of showing up at your resort bleeding from the face and begging to get in. You, you, YOU — the guy who looks like a Christmas haggis inexplicably brought to life by Frosty’s magic hat — yes, you of all people said that. You attempted — with evident fucking glee — to get 24 million people thrown off their health insurance. You gave billions away to corporations and the already wealthy while simultaneously telling struggling poor people that you were doing exactly the opposite. You endorsed a pedophile, praised brutal dictators, and defended LITERAL FUCKING NAZIS! Ninety-nine percent of everything you say is either false, crazy, incoherent, just plain cruel, or a rancid paella of all four. Oh, by the way, Puerto Rico is still FUBAR. You got yourself and your family billions in tax breaks for Christmas. What do they get? More paper towels? Enough, enough, enough, enough! For the love of God and all that is holy, good, and pure, would you please, finally and forever, shut your feculent KFC-hole until you have something valuable — or even marginally civil — to say? You are a fried dick sandwich with a side of schlongs. If chlamydia and gonorrhea had a son, you’d appoint him HHS secretary. You are a disgraceful, pustulant hot stew full of casuistry, godawful ideas, unintelligible non sequiturs, and malignant rage. You are the perfect circus orangutan diaper from Plato’s World of Forms. So fuck you mr. president. And fuck you forever. Oh, and Pence, you oleaginous house ferret. Fuck you, too. You'll be as useful as a chocolate teapot against a medical crisis you Bible thumping cock socket.
  5. The Houston Astros fired two team executives Monday after Major League Baseball Commissioner Robert Manfred levied a hefty fine and other punishments to the club for violating league rules in a cheating scheme used during the 2017 playoffs and 2018 season. The Astros, which won the World Series in 2017, will pay a $5 million fine and forfeit its first- and second-round draft selections for the next two seasons, Manfred said in his nine-page decision. General Manager Jeff Luhnow and team manager A.J. Hinch were both suspended without pay for the 2020 season and fired by the team about an hour after the MLB released its ruling.
  7. Tors, with so many people out of work, do you think that crime is going to start to ramp up?
  8. It would not surprise me. I know people are talking about watching games with no fans but somehow forget that the players are not immune and playing in those games would increase their risk to get the CoronaVirus. All it takes is one player or coach or trainer or groundskeeper or media employee to infect an entire clubhouse. It’s too big a risk to have all of these players traveling all over the country and staying in different hotels and riding in buses. The baseball culture has always been that players spend half of their game time spitting all over the place so everyone needs to chill and let science fix this issue before they play games.
  9. I wonder if @m0nkey ever imagined that Eppler’s future would end up with Diphtheria.
  10. WASHINGTON -- Dr. Anthony Fauci says social and physical distancing guidelines designed to curb the spread of the novel coronavirus could be relaxed when the country sees "essentially no new cases" or deaths for a period of time.