I love reviewing resumes

[Vernster52]

Years ago I interviewed for a job at Imperial Valley college.  I don't remember the exact question but in the answer I talked about my siblings, referring to my brother and sister.

 

The interviewer asked me what a sibling was.

[AngelsLongBall]

Apparently spelling is no longer required to get a GED, I see horribly mis-spelled words on resumes.

[Splint7438]

Lol I knew you would break out the Noseotasle! This same guy is now working the Mideast noseotations for peace in the region.

[Bruce Nye]

I worked at a defense contractor for many years.  Most of our work was "specially classified" meaning not only would you have to have security clearances, you were required to pass a polygraph test from time to time.  A young engineer had been interviewed and looked promising.  The final step was the polygraph test.

 

The head of our security met the young guy and explained that the purpose was to discover if you could be vulnerable to extortion or compromising situations.  So there are questions about life style and drug use.  "Do you use drugs?"

 

Candidate: "Man this is nerve wracking.  Of course I do, I just put out a blunt before walking in here this morning."

 

Our security guy was rolling over in laughter when he told me of this incident.

[St1ck]

I worked at a defense contractor for many years.  Most of our work was "specially classified" meaning not only would you have to have security clearances, you were required to pass a polygraph test from time to time.  A young engineer had been interviewed and looked promising.  The final step was the polygraph test.

 

The head of our security met the young guy and explained that the purpose was to discover if you could be vulnerable to extortion or compromising situations.  So there are questions about life style and drug use.  "Do you use drugs?"

 

Candidate: "Man this is nerve wracking.  Of course I do, I just put out a blunt before walking in here this morning."

 

Our security guy was rolling over in laughter when he told me of this incident.

 

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-TZ8Z5S9rI

[Mudville]

i had a kid list "skilled rubix cuber" for some scholarship at cal.

epic. i had to bring him in so i could smack in on the side of the head in person.

rubix cube is the easiest thing in the world to solve once you learn the 4 basic moves in the stupid little book.

ypu should have ****ed with the guy and replaced one red sqaure with a blue so he could never solve it. Then rip him for lying on his resume.

[Bruce Nye]

ypu should have ****ed with the guy and replaced one red sqaure with a blue so he could never solve it. Then rip him for lying on his resume.

 

 

Experienced "cubers" will spot that in an instant.  One of the first things you do is note the six colors on your cube and decide which is the bottom color.

[Brandon]

how does one pronounce noseotasle? or how is it phonetically?

[Count Orlok]

I've seen similar. People think the more crap they put on their resume the better.

 

My ideal resume lists 1 school (wherever you got your degree from) and degree type. I don't need to know that you got a 2.63 GPA at LBSU. It doesn't help. Throw 2 jobs on there where you have at least 2+ years tenure. Go crazy with the shit you handled, but don't tell me you single handedly increased profits by 600%. 

What about people with multiple degrees or a masters?

[Splint7438]

the interview started like this...

 

I can't be the only other person that recognizes this couch and camera set up.

[Splint7438]

Nose ee oh Tass el

[2112]

I wonder about polygraphs.

I had one while in college for a part time position. My previous job was at a liquor store. One of the questions was had I ever drank on the job. I even told the interviewer, Did you see who my previous employer was?

The truth was yes I had, I figured I wouldn't pass, and not get the job.

I passed the test.

[mp170.6]

I can't be the only other person that recognizes this couch and camera set up.

 

That's the meeting room in Washington DC where lobbyists meet with politicians. 

[HaloMagic]

the interview started like this...

Dude how'd you get a picture of my office?

[Hollyw00d]

Another guy lists the following under strengths:

 

Consistently provided 5 star 5 diamond customer service

 

 

did he work for fletcher jones mercedes benz in newport beach?

[Blarg]

Dude how'd you get a picture of my office?

 

He was searching for porn+casting couch.

[Taylor]

did he work for fletcher jones mercedes benz in newport beach?

 

5-Star service at One Star Drive!

[mp170.6]

He was searching for porn+casting couch.

 

How would you know that?

[Adam]

What about people with multiple degrees or a masters?

List the last/most prestigious one

Edited November 25, 2013 by Adam

[Vegas Halo Fan]

Apparently spelling is no longer required to get a GED, I see horribly mis-spelled words on resumes.

 

The best ones are misspelled words directly related to the applicant's education, qualifications and experience. On resumes for medical personnel, you see some real doozies when the applicants name procedures they have performed and specific skills that they have.

[nate]

I am allergic to erythromycin and the nurses that take that information from me can never spell it correctly.  Not that it is an easy word to spell but you would think in that profession you would need to know.

[nate]

Man Confidently Hits ‘Send’ On Worst Job Application Company Has Ever Seen

 

[arch stanton]

It was probably intentional. From what I've seen lately being an infamous dumbass pays better than being a competent 9-to-5er.

[St1ck]

It was probably intentional. From what I've seen lately being an infamous dumbass pays better than being a competent 9-to-5er.

 

 

It's from The Onion. 

[Vegas Halo Fan]

I am allergic to erythromycin and the nurses that take that information from me can never spell it correctly.  Not that it is an easy word to spell but you would think in that profession you would need to know.

 

One of the biggest problems in medicine is nurses (and doctors, for that matter), either misspelling or illegibly writing the name of a medication so that it gets mistaken for something else.