Weird co-workers

[tdawg87]

6 hours ago, Tank said:

According to US News & World Report, they’re the #7 ranked school for educating single moms.

Nice to see them finally crack the top 10.

[ten ocho recon scout]

On 12/13/2019 at 4:59 PM, AngelsLakersFan said:

It's not bullets you should be worried about him spraying.

Got to this thread late. Wanted to read the comments to make sure no one else already posted what i wanted to.

Serves me right for reading a thread from last year.

[tdawg87]

So most people know I help people with disabilities for a living. Well there was a dude who worked here for years who basically went off the grid when his wife left him. He literally lived out of his van and bathed in the river. He also made his clothes out of cheap fabric. Had a thing for cutting pants into shorts and then wearing them with boots. 

Dude was weird. Shared tons of conspiracy shit on Facebook, so I guess he wasn't really "off the grid". 

And this man would drive his vanhouse into work 5 days a week with his poncho and cut off khaki shorts and Islamic beard to assist the mentally retarded in developing independence.

[Blarg]

Looks like the right man for the right job.

[tdawg87]

The owner said if he ever found out he took a shower in one of the clients homes he'd fire him on the spot.

[Slegnaac]

1 hour ago, tdawg87 said:

So most people know I help people with disabilities for a living. Well there was a dude who worked here for years who basically went off the grid when his wife left him. He literally lived out of his van and bathed in the river. He also made his clothes out of cheap fabric. Had a thing for cutting pants into shorts and then wearing them with boots. 

Dude was weird. Shared tons of conspiracy shit on Facebook, so I guess he wasn't really "off the grid". 

And this man would drive his vanhouse into work 5 days a week with his poncho and cut off khaki shorts and Islamic beard to assist the mentally retarded in developing independence.

So he is a native of New Hampshire?

[tdawg87]

11 minutes ago, Slegnaac said:

So he is a native of New Hampshire?

Listen here you little shit

[Slegnaac]

I use to work on a loading dock.  There was a guy, Jerry, that worked on the second floor of the building and his window over looked the dock.  Without fail if someone came in through the dock with a box of donuts, Jerry would show up to "chat" with the guys on the dock and snag a donut.

So one of the guys brought in an empty pink donut box one day and left it on the table.  Sure enough Jerry showed up a few minutes later.  He talked with the guys for a while, then went and opened the empty box.  

[Vegas Halo Fan]

22 hours ago, red321 said:

One guy was a story topper...if you went skiing...he was a former ski instructor in the Swiss Alps...if you watched a tv show...he was responsible for building the opening credits scene...and this was prior to the Iraq war...so if he wasn't in the office it was probably because he had been paged by the Seals and he had to go call them back on this STU telephone in his closet at home...and if you didn't see him for a couple of days, it was probably because his 350lb ass was sent on a secret sniper mission to assassinate Saddam Hussein.

I worked with a correctional case manager in Oklahoma years ago who had tons of stories about her supposed past life as a production assistant on I Spy with Bill Cosby and Robert Culp. She gave a detailed story about some prop that she had forgotten to replace when they were changing scenes, and that if you looked closely, it appeared and disappeared. She claimed to have babysat Jeff and Beau Bridges (which was physically impossible, given that they were born in the 1940s and eight years apart), and to have dated Donny Osmond. She was three bills easily, and I could tell that she had never been attractive.

An inmate came in late for intake one night. As I was processing him in, he claimed that he played on Tom Landry's first Cowboys Super Bowl team, and that he was given Super Bowl tickets every year. I had to explore this further (he had a lot of orthopedic surgery scars, but he certainly wasn't built like an NFL player).  I asked him where he played college ball. He told me USC. When I did the math, in order to fit the time frame that he had given, he would have been a senior on the Trojans' football squad when he was 12.

[Vegas Halo Fan]

On 12/13/2019 at 6:41 PM, Lou said:

song is now stuck in my head.

don't really mind 

I had never heard it before. Not bad at all.

[Lou]

4 hours ago, Vegas Halo Fan said:

An inmate came in late for intake one night . . . . 

 

 I asked him where he played college ball. He told me USC.

I believe him. 

[Vegas Halo Fan]

On 1/3/2020 at 1:25 PM, red321 said:

Another guy was tired of driving for his commute...so he bought an RV and parked it in the corner of the parking lot. In the morning he would sit in a folding chair in his robe drinking coffee waving to everyone as they drove in.

I believe that you are just remembering old Trapper John, M. D. story lines.

[Tank]

On 12/13/2019 at 6:41 PM, Lou said:

song is now stuck in my head.

don't really mind 

it's okay, but not as catchy as "my girl's sipping' a mai tai."

[Lou]

10 minutes ago, Tank said:

it's okay, but not as catchy as "my girl's sipping' a mai tai."

'she drinkin' real sloooow..."

[arch stanton]

There's a generator used for ground power on aircraft that don't have APU's that we just call the -60. It's a basic turbine generator and it blows hot exhaust straight up in the air at a pretty high rate. I had a co-worker who liked to shit in the exhaust and watch everyone scramble to avoid being sprayed with flying turds when it was powered up

[Tank]

46 minutes ago, arch stanton said:

There's a generator used for ground power on aircraft that don't have APU's that we just call the -60. It's a basic turbine generator and it blows hot exhaust straight up in the air at a pretty high rate. I had a co-worker who liked to shit in the exhaust and watch everyone scramble to avoid being sprayed with flying turds when it was powered up

I'm not in management but that seems like something that could/should get you fired.

[arch stanton]

17 minutes ago, Tank said:

I'm not in management but that seems like something that could/should get you fired.

It was military. It just got him sent to work in the tool crib

[Tank]

18 minutes ago, arch stanton said:

It was military. It just got him sent to work in the tool crib

what happens in the tool crib?

[Lou]

1 minute ago, Tank said:

what happens in the tool crib?

@tdawg87's internal alarm just went off

[arch stanton]

5 minutes ago, Tank said:

what happens in the tool crib?

When they don't want you to touch airplanes you go there and hand out tools

[Tank]

35 minutes ago, arch stanton said:

When they don't want you to touch airplanes you go there and hand out tools

wow, Air Force detention. there ya go.

[Slegnaac]

9 hours ago, arch stanton said:

When they don't want you to touch airplanes you go there and hand out tools

Who would want that guy to hand them a tool?

 

And the story needs to include a line about waste management. 

[Lhalo]

22 hours ago, arch stanton said:

There's a generator used for ground power on aircraft that don't have APU's that we just call the -60. It's a basic turbine generator and it blows hot exhaust straight up in the air at a pretty high rate. I had a co-worker who liked to shit in the exhaust and watch everyone scramble to avoid being sprayed with flying turds when it was powered up

[tdawg87]

I laughed at a lady at work today for farting. Well Fuck me because apparently my reaction was rude and immature, since she has "Gastroparesis" which causes excess flatulence or whatever the fuck. Apparently this is well known and she has a note.

We live in a world where I can't even laugh at someone for aggressively pinching a loaf because she's paying tribute to her dead husband or some fuckin shit. 

Like *pfrggggggggt* oops sorry that was just my hourly queef for peepaw I miss him so much.

I hate this planet.

[Slegnaac]

You just forgot to say "With all due respect" after laughing.