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Adam

Law Office On My Floor

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Guessing its one of these firms that represents an insurance company because there are depositions at this office all the time. Occasionally I'm fortunate enough to walk down the hall while some mouth-breather is outside the office talking to his attorney. Today's convo was a real gem.

The Deposed: "I know I shouldn't have said that about Judy."

Attorney: "Yeah that was not good."

The Deposed: "How bad is it?"

Attorney: "Pretty fucking bad if I'm being honest."

The Deposed: "Should I change my story?"

Attorney: "You think lying under oath is a good strategy?"

The Deposed: "You're the lawyer. What do you think?"

Attorney: "Jesus, man."

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I used to work in downtown Irvine where all the tall buildings are. I look out of my window on the 11th floor and literally see a couple hundred people in animal costumes going into the Marriott next door. I found out they were coming from a furry convention. We couldn’t believe the shit we were seeing so a bunch of us went over there to the bar area just to watch the chaos. Facking hilarious.

Side note, it’s the same Marriott where we all crashed after @Adam wedding.

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6 hours ago, red321 said:

I once stayed at the hotel in Chicago where the Jerry Springer show put up it's guests.

the midget holding hands (above his head) with the 6'' 300lb female dominatrix riding in the elevator was probably the highlight

which one was @tdawg87?

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7 hours ago, red321 said:

I once stayed at the hotel in Chicago where the Jerry Springer show put up it's guests.

the midget holding hands (above his head) with the 6'' 300lb female dominatrix riding in the elevator was probably the highlight

By far and away the creepiest call of my career...

Long story short, just the... most... disturbing family of all time..... involved incest, a tranny, severely retarded / physically handicapped kid, etc etc.

Anyway, while talking to "the dad" in this case, he mentioned how they went on jerry springer, because he wanted to embarrass the tranny. 

I was blown away, because i always thought the show was totally staged. (I still think it is, but there are obviously some real ones)

It was called "tales of the shemales".... lol 

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I used to ride the blue line to LA for work and some of the conversations would blow me away...

Things like... "Hey man, when did you get out?"

Or...

Three girls talking... two are friends and the other is someone they just met.  The one tells the other two she just found out she's pregnant and the other two tell her she needs to get on welfare right away and all the reasons why...

Another time..

I saw a kid hop on the train and is looking nervously out the window... I see some sheriffs in the parking lot and he's watching them. I then notice he has a tracking device on his ankle...

Another time...

There was this guy who regularly got on the train and asked for money.... he would tell everyone he was blind and then proceed to take one of his fake eye balls out. 

Good times...

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17 hours ago, Adam said:

Guessing its one of these firms that represents an insurance company because there are depositions at this office all the time. Occasionally I'm fortunate enough to walk down the hall while some mouth-breather is outside the office talking to his attorney. Today's convo was a real gem.

The Deposed: "I know I shouldn't have said that about Judy."

Attorney: "Yeah that was not good."

The Deposed: "How bad is it?"

Attorney: "Pretty Facking bad if I'm being honest."

The Deposed: "Should I change my story?"

Attorney: "You think lying under oath is a good strategy?"

The Deposed: "You're the lawyer. What do you think?"

Attorney: "Jesus, man."

I hate it when this happens.

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1 hour ago, calscuf said:

I hate it when this happens.

You need to stop having conversations with your clients in the hallway.

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I had a college professor named Michael Jordan. He was a white, nerdy guy who's older than the Michael Jordan. He told us that he once happened to be staying in the same hotel as the NBA star. He received two voicemails to his room that were meant for the other Michael Jordan: one was confirming a tee time the next morning, the other was from a sultry woman confirming their tee time.

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58 minutes ago, Taylor said:

You need to stop having conversations with your clients in the hallway.

and please tell judy hello for me.

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1 hour ago, Taylor said:

You need to stop having conversations with your clients in the hallway.

When you’re doing a deposition at a defense attorneys office, you don’t have many other options.  I often yell at my clients in hallways.

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2 hours ago, Catwhoshatinthehat said:

Am I the only one who imagines that somewhere there's a picture of cals on a bus stop for his firm that's likely being urinated on by a transient?  

I always picture Better Call Saul

Or that time he posted a pic of his boner in tighty whiteys with his dog staring at it like it was the last lamb chop on earth. 

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